as i mentioned in yesterday’s incoherent blog post, i really do consider monday, june 6, 2011 the biggest thing i’ve done in my career. and it feels incredible. i couldn’t be more overwhelmed with gratitude, love, thankfulness, joy, exhaustion. i hosted seventeen photographers from all over: british columbia, alberta, saskatchewan & washington at my studio for a full-day of learning. i arrived at seven thirty in the morning to compose myself [and finish a few details] and left that evening at eight thirty after dinner. thirteen hour day. phew!

after a round of introductions and hugs, we settled into breakfast, catered by wendell’s cafe. each workshop attendee was greeted with a dark chocolate bar from mink chocolates in vancouver [favourite. so good] and a brand new moleskine journal for all their dreaming thoughts to be recorded upon. although i share my studio space with two other businesses, they graciously allowed me to take over that day. the office was completely transformed thanks to gorgeous black linens, cute little white chairs & an abundance of colourful flowers designed by stephanie lee at balconi floral studio. stephanie is brilliant at what she does–i simply gave her a few words as my “vision” and she ran with it. love.

for nine full hours, we sat in my [un-air-conditioned] studio and talked through dreaming, goal-setting, branding, marketing, harnessing the power of your network, organization, outsourcing, pricing strategies, knowing your business numbers & planning your next action steps. in the afternoon, we drove to a nearby location for a live “model” shoot with two of my best friends in the world. leanne & sam. i can’t thank them enough for their gorgeous, gorgeous faces and their fun laughter and their willingness to stand in front of eighteen cameras. yes. EIGHTEEN cameras. i am blessed by them immensely. the friendship i have found in them is for life.

leanne’s make-up was done to perfection by kristy lee make-up. kristy is the best out there. seriously. she happens to be my cousin & i’m pumped that i get to have her for my wedding someday. ;) check out her website & her facebook fan page. the wildflowers leanne held were also designed by stephanie lee at balconi floral studio. so understated and perfect. leanne’s dress was purchased from H&M and her floral/hippie headband from peacelovevintageshop on etsy.

lyndsay london emailed me a few horrendous photos of me in action on the workshop day. ;) bahaha. they made me laugh, thought you might enjoy the behind the scenes look. — just a random note: it was so fun to have two of my past brides with me for my first workshop, lyndsay and erika. love familiar faces.

this is me looking like a beaver.

if i photograph you, we will get close. it’s okay. i brush my teeth religiously.

and here is the entire group! wow. thank you to my beautiful friend and assistant candace huck for being so so helpful. i couldn’t have handled that day + the set-up on saturday without you. another thank you [i feel like i'm accepting some award. i really need to shut up soon] to my friend arielle for graciously spending sunday afternoon re-arranging tables + chairs in my studio until we found the perfect layout. i feel LOVED. oh oh, one more thing. i have amazing friends. God has placed some ridiculously beautiful people in my life and i was overwhelmed with all the tweets and texts i received throughout monday. whenever i would quickly check my phone, more texts would come in that made me smile. it was just great. monday was great. it was a big moment & sharing it with people made it even bigger.

thanks for believing in me.

i bought a book called the war of art, by steven pressfield because i read on donald miller’s blog that he loved it. i love donald miller and i assume i’ll love what he loves. donald calls it one of his favourite books on writing ever written: i have to agree. but it’s so much more than writing. it’s a book about life. i read it in a day this past week and i haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since.

within the first few pages of the book, we are introduced to this concept of the Resistance. not a new concept to me, having previously read linchpin by seth godin [as mentioned in this blog post] however, pressfield expands upon this idea in much greater detail.

the opening paragraph is as follows, “most of us have two lives. the life we live, and the unlived life within us. between the two stands Resistance.” pressfield continues on the next page, “to yield to Resistance deforms our spirit. It stunts us and makes us less than we are and were born to be. If you believe in God you must declare Resistance evil, for it prevents us from achieving the life God intended when He endowed each of us with our own unique genius.”

the war of art is a short book, an easy read at only one hundred and fifty pages. there are some concepts in the book i do not agree with including all the mumbo-jumbo about “muses” whispering into our ear and such. pressfield is a theist–not a Christian, so he & i differ on quite a few things. that being said, this book was an eye-opener.

i believe in a God, who has given us unique gifts and talents and abilities. He has our days written in His book, knows what person would be best for us to marry, what career we would flourish most in, where we should live for which seasons of our lives, which challenges He should bring along to refine us. He knows it all. He knows what you were created to do. and i believe He’s already spoken it to you.

i’m learning more everyday about what i was created to do. when you find something doing something you were not created to do [wasting time, employed in a job you're not passionate about, spending time with people that drag you down, staying silent about the things you believe in] think about the Resistance. why are you letting ____ stand in your way of what you truly want to do which is ______? this will take some thought.

i see this in my business, in my writing, in my time-management. i don’t like it. but when i can recognize those times as Resistance, it makes me excited, because i have a choice. i was on my way home from the studio the other day. i was tired: i was up too early, working too hard, my hoodie and yoga pants were calling me from the couch in my bedroom. i drove to the gym, arguing with myself the whole way, it’s only one workout. you can skip it. NO! i will get on that treadmill and that elliptical and i will prove to myself, prove to this Resistance that this is going to take thirty minutes out of my day and push me closer to health: what i was created for. felt so wonderful afterwards. :)

i was rocked when i took this concept one step further, applying these ideas into my Christian walk. i am a Christian. i believe in Jesus and i believe that He has saved my soul and i’m spending eternity in Heaven. i know that my sole purpose on this Earth is to tell people about Jesus’ saving grace. yep. sole purpose. okay, so if you’re tracking with me, that is the work i was created to do. therefore, anything that stands in between the life i’m living NOW [assumedly wasting time and not sharing the gospel] and the life i want to live [unashamedly sharing about my faith verbally on a daily basis] is RESISTANCE.

this Resistance [which Pressfield so aptly calls evil in the first chapter] is killing my purpose in this life. this Resistance causes me to procrastinate on telling that person about my faith, asking that friend about Jesus, going out of my way to avoid someone because really… my to-do list today needs to be accomplished. one page, titled “Resistance and Rationalization, Part Two” made me think. to summarize, Resistance is fear. and we try to rationalize our way out of those fears: reasons why we shouldn’t act. the worst thing is, we’re smart and often these rationalizations make sense. personal example: some people will think i’m nuts when i talk about Jesus. that’s truth. that’s also me rationalizing as to why i shouldn’t talk about Him. dangit! i want to overcome this Resistance. i see men like carl lentz, judah smith, richie wilkerson jr: they’ve overcome this Resistance [with the help of the Lord, of course.] they tell anybody who sits beside ‘em about their faith. i want to do that.

i’ve had conversations with my family before about this and it always come up, “some people have a gift of evangelism.” and it’s true, sure, i believe some have an exceptional gift and that men like carl, judah and richie could have this gift. however. i’m not convinced of it. they are men with fear, just like you and i. i think these are THREE men who have stood up and said, screw resistance and not standing up to what God has called the church to be. ordinary men stepping up to an exceptional purpose. — if you’re not a Christian, i hope you can see how this would still apply to your life and whatever message you feel passionate about sharing.

the last page of the book kills me. SO GOOD:

are you a born writer? were you put on earth to be a painter, a scientist, an apostle of peace? in the end the question can only be answered by action. do it or don’t do it… if you were meant to cure cancer or write a symphony… and you don’t do it, you not only hurt yourself… you hurt your children. you hurt me. you hurt the planet.

you shame the angels who watch over you and you spite the Almighty, who created you and only you with your unique gifts, for the sole purpose of nudging the human race one millimetre farther along its path back to God.

creative work is not a selfish act or a bid for attention on the part of the actor. it’s a gift to the world and every being in it. don’t cheat us of your contribution. give us what you’ve got.

WORDDDDDDD!!!!!!
[i never say that, i just didn't know what else to say. i feel like standing up on a stage with a microphone somewhere and preaching my face off. this is so good.]

ps. all excerpts are from “the war of art” by steven pressfield and i recommend you buy it & ignore everything about muses. hahah!

two months of writing and practicing and preparation had led up to one day. the morning i would share my heart on dreaming, to a beautiful group of seventy-some photographers at the imagequestBC conference. this wasn’t a comfortable thing for me. thinking about presenting scared me… so that’s why i did it. i’ve always loved public speaking–but i still get crazy nervous beforehand. the only way i could stay calm that morning was breathing out and repeating “okayyyy” every five seconds.

but i LOVED it once i got up there. i felt so appreciated and supported by everyone. i feel blessed, so blessed, to have been given the opportunity and the stage to share my heart. it was an absolute pleasure & if you were there, thank you so much for coming! a special thank you to my friend kristen leigh who flew hours and hours all the way from maryland to be with me for this day & also snapped these [unflattering--haha] photos of my presentation. i kid; i’m happy to have something to blog!