the train story.
traveling with only the use of public transportation is a very different experience for me. i love road trips with my own car, when i am in full control of when the wheels leave and when the wheels stop. i don’t control buses or trains and have no resume in this whole transit world. kristen and i knew we wanted to visit st. andrews, a town about ninety kilometres north of edinburgh. a blog reader [who told me about the town] suggested we take the train: she named the station, where we’d need to get a cab at the other end, everything. perfect. except i decided to google for a little more information [i have a hard time fully trusting the first answer is the best answer.] i stumbled upon an eHow page called getting to st. andrews from edinburgh. bingo.
eHow.com outlined the costs of traveling for one person in a taxi, bus or train. overwhelmingly, the bus seemed to be the cheapest option: ten pounds round-trip & passengers are dropped right in the heart of the city. i didn’t study the options too closely; i simply saw bus, cheaper, takes an hour longer, who cares, we like driving and if we can save money, the bus it was. we wake up on our “st. andrews day” and cab ten minutes to the bus station. we are there early [so prepared and responsible] and we use the little change machine to get our ticket money ready. it’s all so exciting, this transit stuff.
we pick seats at the very, very back of the bus. that’s what the cool kids do in the movies, right? ten minutes into the trip, we discover this is a bad idea. feels like a roller coaster. we move halfway up the bus and within ten minutes, kristen is out like a light–asleep, AGAIN. what do i have to do to get a travel buddy that stays awake?! caffeine pills, maybe. my legs are so short that only the balls of my feet touch the ground so with every jerk of the bus, my silky skirt causes me to slide farther down the vinyl seats. i try to push myself up with the tips of my toes, but this gets tiring after an hour.
an hour and a half into the ride, kristen stirs. hey. kristen. you up? look around this bus. we are the only people under sixty on board. — hah. so true. only retired people have enough time in their day to spend three hours riding a bus to a destination an hour away. — perfect. just the retirees and us, it is. we arrived in st. andrews without any major problems [except the already noted silky skirt/vinyl seat & chronically-sleeping travel buddy] and enjoyed our day. let’s fast forward to the exciting part of this…


because of my intense online study of the bus schedule the day before, i knew we wanted the x58 bus at 7:45pm. we arrived early [we try! we do!] at 7:15pm and waited half an hour on the station floor. the x59 bus arrives [not the x58!] we ask the bus driver about our bus to edinburgh. umm. it’s coming. — uhh, k thanks for that. 8 o’ clock comes. we must have missed it… but how did we miss it? we’ve been obsessively checking every bus since seven o’ clock! we decided that was the bus and that lady had no idea what she was talking about. okay, fine. i check my schedule, another bus is coming at 8:45pm.
we sit back down on the station floor [professional wait-ers by this point, close to an hour and a half going strong.] i feel like we’re catching a flight. i start pacing the station, checking bus route maps and posters and the screen above. i see two times for edinburgh, 8:33 and 8:53. perfect! kristen, 8:33 it is! i thought it was odd that my trusty schedule didn’t mark either of those times–but the screen don’t lie. and if that doesn’t come, the 8:45 will do! more talking, pacing, people-watching, 30-pence bathroom breaks.
8:37pm. i jump up from my seat with a sudden intensity. ohhh no. ohhh no. oh no no no. i’m back at the two bus screens before kristen can say a word. below the right-hand screen was a printed piece of paper with the words “train schedule” and an arrow… the 8:33 and 8:53 “buses” were trains. in the same brain wave of clarity, i check my bus schedule. the 8:45pm bus has the letters FO beside it. friday only. it was not a friday. ohhh no.
kristen. grab your bags. now. we need to go. there’s no bus. there’s no bus out of here until tomorrow. we need to take a train, that leaves in sixteen minutes. go go go! i know she had no idea what was happening as she followed my frantic footsteps. cab, cab! we need a cab! ohhh praise the lord, there’s one. we hopped in, the train station please! as we nervously laughed and fidgeted with our bags in the back seat, i checked the time on my phone. 8:41. we had to be at the edinburgh airport at 6:45am the following morning–we needed to be in edinburgh tonight. if we miss this train, we miss that plane, we stay the night in st. andrews with only the clothes on our back.
the driver overheard our conversation–what time’s your train girls? more nervous laughter from me. i honestly didn’t remember. too much adrenaline. kristen pipes up, when we were in the station, you said something about sixteen minutes? — oh, that sounds right: i know it was in the early 8:50′s. somewhere around there. cabbie glances at the clock: 8:42. one quick question sir, how long is the drive? — about fifteen minutes. more nervous laughter from us. but hold on girlies, we’ll get you there.
we pull into the train station, completely ignorant of the current time–psssh, it would be a waste of time to stop and check the time. kristen, there’s no train! that’s either a really good or bad sign! we’re running as fast as we can, both with heavy bags, our cameras and a shopping bag each towards the train platform. we run into a fence. ahh! we need to go that way. kristen! i motion with my right hand towards the stairs across the platform. you need to climb the stairs! you go, go, leave me behind! i can’t go as fast, my bun is falling out and my backpack is making me wobble like a turtle! i’ll follow! take one for the teammmm! kristen takes off, both of us hysterically laughing. kristen slips out of sight up the stairs as i watch the cab driver slowly leave the parking lot. [that made everything funnier to me: the fact that he watched us frantically exit and run FULL speed in the opposite direction. classic us.]


my hair fixed firmly secured in a ponytail, my backpack as balanced as it’ll ever be, i catch up to kristen, huddled over the electronic ticket machine. jamie, i can’t figure it out! help me, help me. i hand her my stuff, grabbing her visa card. okay, return to edinburgh, select. one adult. what? no! not return! one-way!! cancel! okay, other destinations. e-d-o, frick! backspace! i’m hopping up and down and kristen is yelling. E-D-I-N, edinburgh, one-way anytime, one adult. add another passenger. insert your card. “your card is not accepted. try again.” oh you better BELIEVE we’re trying again! accept, accept! ACCE–OH GOOD.
the tickets print, we grab them from the dispenser. the clock reads 8:51. WE DID IT. breathless, i can barely stand i am laughing so hard. we stop for ten seconds, enough to look around. the sunset was incredible, the light out of this world, the moment so perfectly full of bliss and adventure and nerves and joy. we threw our bags onto a bench nearby and grabbed our cameras for forty-five seconds of portraits until we saw the train approaching.
kristen walked to the bench to gather up her stuff. oh. crap. jamie, i can’t find my ticket. — what do you mean you can’t find it?! — i mean, i don’t know where i put it. i think i had it on top. i only have my receipt. not the ticket. — you’re kidding me. kristen. — i’m scurrying about, lifting bags up, setting bags down when an orange piece of paper three feet away catches my eye. — found it!!! AHH!!! PTL. we burst onto the train with our bags and cameras and purses, filling the empty cabin with explosive laughter. rapid-fire dialogue between us, only paused to quickly gasp for breath, i cannot believe that all just happened. — i cannot believe we waited at a bus station for two hours only to end up catching a train. — i cannot believe i sat on a bus for three hours this morning with a bunch of old people driving through tiny country roads while you slept. — i cannot believe he drove that fast — i cannot believe we ran the wrong direction in the train station parking lot!! i cannot believe we actually caught this train!!!
the excitement and giggles die down within a half hour to a restful silence: paralleling the vibrant sunset, that in the same time frame, dimmed to a black sky. i look up from my journal, pause adele on my iphone, unplug my headphones and kick kristen under the table. you know what i cannot believe? she lifts her head from the window and opens her eyes, what’s that? — stinkin’ eHow.com. telling us to take the bus. never again, eHow, ne-VER a-GAIN.
















































